Crazy four nights when my mom was away. I haven't been getting much sleep cus I was trying to make full use of my free nights. Now I have crazily huge eyebags and darker-than-dark dark rings.
I wished I had more nights.
Spent the last night clubbing with Pri, Natt and Mad.
Danced on Arena's podium, met some really nice people, some not-so, and really weird ones, sat on puke and washed my skirt in the toilet...
It was an experience. HAHA.
Right now, I just need to catch up on my sleep.
But however tired I am, I still get hyped up over my pracs. Re-took my prac one earlier on. I felt so close to passing. The instructors today were awesome. I received so much more attention from them, and it really helped. Nowwww, I can't wait for my other pracs :D

Hady texted me a couple of days ago, telling me I should return his "stupid green jacket", I quote, to him whenever I'm free to do so. Now only want to take back. That time I fold nice2 don't want to take right? Confident we'll patch back only. Lucky I have concession now, can take bus down to Tampines just to return his stupid green jacket, or maybe meet Nur and Daniel for awhile since they are neighbours.
I miss them both.
Daniel's simply too adorable. And I'm sure anyone whom I've ever shown his pic too would agree.
AND I LOVE MY GIRLFRIENDS/SHFs/F4/SHUGARIEES/ORWHATEVERNAMEWEUSEDTOCALLOURSELVES. MWUAH MWUAH MWUAH. HAHA. I have a compulsion to express my love for my girlies.
I can't imagine life without them. It would be so dull.
And a large part of my good memories are of my girls. (Even though Nas keeps dreaming of my dying, I'll forgive her) If I lose them, I think I'd lose my sense of self-identity.
The sleepover last night was a blast, apart from the space constraint.
We had fun doing our little "runway show" at Sengkang swimming complex, then yummy dinner at jln kayu, camwhored in bed, bitched, watched 200 Pounds Beauty.
The guys were totally not allowing me to enjoy my emo moment at the end of the movie.
I think if I ever were to strike it rich right, I would totally do up my room. You open my door only (eh actually my door's always open) it's all mattress. Then we can all roll2, kick2, lepak2 one corner all we want. Hehehehe. Good idea right?
But then I must customise my bedspreads. Grrr.
The things I do for my girls..
HAHAHAHHA.
We had a visit in the middle of the night though: Alfaro and Airpork.
Weird much.
But I thought they were pretty decent guys (in comparison to my mats and ugly pussified losers I devoted my entire love life to)
Alfaro's coming over later again, hopefully with dvds and more random conversations. He's cooking dinner for me and my bro. So, woohooo to me being a bum tonight :D
Annnd.. I think the pranks were magnificently executed last night. HAHAHAHAHA. I re-read my chat logs in class. I LMAOed.
ROCK ON NAS&PRI!! \m/
Lovelove my girlies. Wednesday night is coming.

Some weird guy named Alan just called me and asked how's my life. In Chinese. I don't remember any Alans, that's one. I don't remember having any friend who speaks to me in Chinese, two. And I really really don't remember a Alan, maybe except for Mummy Coco's son, whom I've never spoken to. Whatever.
Oh, and me and Akbar were talking about Wisdom Teeth. His are just growing and they are fucking hurting him. I saw my uncle's when he got it extracted. It's like an inch long of root. I really don't want mine to grow! Aren't there people out there who don't have wisdom teeth? Super scary. I think I'd rather have a nail ripped out, then have my tooth extracted. At least I don't eat with my fingers. I can just put a plaster over it?
I was wondering though, like if your mouth is huge then it wouldn't hurt right? Cus usually what hurts, is the tooth slicing up your gums cus your oral cavity is too crammed. Then Akbar said "yours and nerly should be okay. fucking big sia!" Hahahahahah. Idiot!! (that's what Nerly would say) :) And I'm totally loving my Aeropostale blue hoody. Got it the other day at Toa Payoh for 5bux. I think it's a factory reject. But whatever, you know? Like it's bloody cheap and has long-enough sleeves, body fits nicely too. Only problem is the zip is a little faulty, just like my custom-made sandals from Vietnam. The zip rips itself open every few minutes and it's getting so annoying, I'm thinking I'll never wear em again. But they go so well with my 10dollar purple dress (also from Toa Payoh). Hahaha. Toa Payoh is my new favourite place to hunt for pretty cheap clothes :D
And I don't know if you guys feel embarrassed when you fall, even when no one's around, but I do. I just tripped over my stool in the kitchen and felt so embarrassed. Hahahhaha.
I wanna go down TP again, soon. I miss TP. I hate NYP. I mean I adore my course mates, but there's no one to hang out after classes. So like we either sit around a table at mac (which gets really boring), or go straight home. Like it's 1704 now and I got home at least an hour ago!! It's weird to be home this early. I can't find anything to do, and I'll just eat. My mom's happy with the arrangement though. *makes an ugly face*

For the first time ever since my parents filed for a divorce, my mom and I talked about how I feel about my dad. And I can't stop crying. Fuck. But it's just been so emotional today.
Earlier today, we went for breakfast with my grandmother. She suddenly took an eye shadow, blusher and lipstick out of her bag. My mom asked if she bought it for me and she suddenly started crying. "She's my only grand-daughter. I care a lot about her. Why I cannot buy things for her?" Then she wiped away her tears and talked about normal things again.
Then when we going home, my grandma actually turned to leave already. Then my mom called out to her to remind her to check up private property prices for her. My grandma walked back to where we were and ended up talking for a whole 15mins. Somehow, somewhere, the conversation led up to our family, my dad and his 4children, and how tough my grandmother's life was- shuttling between 3families, trying to unite all of us. She started crying, again. Then I got teary too. For a long while, I bit my lip hard. Then my mom noticed and offered me tissue. That was it. I cried my heart out right in the middle of the bloody Toa Payoh parking lot.
It was a really vulnerable moment for me. I don't think my mom knew I missed my dad till today, neither did my grandmother.
In the car, my mom asked why I cry. I just said "nothing". Then she asked "Is it bcus she talked abt your old man?" I started crying again. She threw the family-pack tissue backwards to me. Ah fuck.
Back home, right now, she's asking if I was angry with her when she left my dad. My reply was no. She asked why? I said I just don't, I don't know and I don't wanna talk about it cus I don't like to. I can tell my mom's hurting cus I can't confide in her, but I really don't know how. I'm not comfortable telling her how I feel, my problems and all. She was saying, we're all we have yet we can't communicate, then how are we gonna survive. Well, we made it through these years. I think it's a silent understanding that no matter what, we got each other's back.
I think as I grow older I get more emotionally vulnerable, it's so hard to restrain my emotions anymore. I used to be able to hide everything.
On to lighter topics.
My mom brought me shopping the past 2days. I think to make up for my low allowance. I got a pair of greyish jeans, pvc leggings w gold zipper, 2 cute dresses, 3 leopard-print panties for $10 (haha) and black sling-back slippers for school. My grandma, too, bought me 2 camisoles and a blue long-enough sleeves jacket. She brought me a Prada wallet from home too. No one in their family wants it! Can you believe those rich people?! Omg.
And I did something really stupid last night. You girls know that midnight blue nail polish I have? :( I dropped it! The bottle broke and nail polish splattered all over the floor, seatee and my feet. Initially I used my nail polish remover to clean up the mess, until I remembered we had thinner. I think I inhaled too much thinner afters, and got quite dizzy. Eew. Why would anyone take inhalants at all? So not cool. So yea, I wanna go back Mustafa!! That was one of my favourite polishes eh. Knnccb.
Any size 6s reading this, text me!! My mom has two pairs of shoes she can't fit into.

Fuck. I'm acting all guy-crazy today. Hahahah wth. Stop it sia Queenie.
I was just sitting and waiting for Amelia and Izzati at Gloria Jeans this morning, when I caught myself blatently checking out guys then smiling to myself, thinking, "omgggg fucking hot!" Then later, smiling to myself again cus I knew I was guilty of it. Hahahahah.
(Talking about hot.. this particularly tall and cute guy told me I'm really hot today. Hehehehe.)
Oh and for the first time in my life, someone took me literally when I said "I think I'm gonna go home and sleep like a pig siaaa!" -.-
He replied me, "Eh sleep like a human being ok! Don't sleep like a pig k." HAHAHAH WTFFF.

School is tiring man. Thank god for the people.